Dear Vicroads,

Who ever has coined this power nap bullshit is obviously a troll, because they do not live in the real world. I understand that fatigue is a serious issue in road safety but your newest campaign is just bullshit.

You’re saying I WILL fall asleep and I will not have any control over where? Really? Because I haven’t slept more than 4 straight hours in 6 months and I’ve never narcolepsyed anywhere except in my bed… And occasionally the couch during Play School.

yawning

Am I yawning? Yeah I fucking am now you turnip, because yawning is a social aspect of being a human. Even now I’m yawning thinking about reading a sign on the Hume highway about fucking yawning! I’m not falling asleep!

But no, I get it. Fatigue is so shit and dangerous when you’re driving. I read somewhere that driving while fatigued is worse than driving drunk* so I totally get where this campaign is coming from.

Power naps is where I’m at a loss though.

Who has time for a power nap? If I tried to pull into one of those power nap bays my kids wouldn’t be having it. My kids are busy napping, and any change in the car environment will wake them. Driving with screaming kids in the car while fatigued has got to be worse than driving while hammered. I hate driving enough without fantasising about ploughing into oncoming traffic just for a little peace and quiet.

SignPowerNap1

Not only that, but the recommended 15 minutes has got to be a joke right? Do you set your alarm for 15 minutes? If so, are you not stressing for the full 15 minutes that you’re not asleep yet, and your alarm is going to be going off in 11 minutes and you’re not going to have used your power nap to the fullest potential?

Who is running these fucking campaigns??

The only thing that I can think of that would actually help the fatigue situation is to set up crèches every 30km. Hell I would drive from Melbourne to Sydney if you guys promised me a good nap. Even if it was just 15 minutes. Although my experience in sleeping 15 minute intervals is that it’s the opposite of a good time.

Maybe the perpeptually fatigued such as myself need a big “F” plate on their windscreens to warn other drivers?

I don’t know. My feedback doesn’t come with a solution, but seeing as you guys have a pretty bossed out advertising department, I hope this issue is seen to immediately.

Regards,

Maddi.

*I’m not citing my sources I’m too fucking tired.