Honest Roadtest: Water Balloons

What the fuck are these?


I know what you’re thinking. You think they’re water balloons. You’re wrong. Water balloons are fun! Aren’t they?? I remember having fun with water balloons… What’s changed?

I’ll tell you what. Two decades and a drought have changed fucking everything about water balloons.


How do you fill these fucking things up? Putting them on a tap seems to be getting iffy results. I think I got about 8 balloons? I was doing this shit for a good half hour?? I ended up having to put the baby on my back because he was getting pissy about my neglect.


So needy. Where's my eyebrows?

In the end, it wasn’t even very fun. They didn’t even pop. Although that might have been my reluctance to throw them. They’re  the precious fruits of my finger loins (?)

I ended up putting some soap in there with and let Eliza play with her new elastic brothers and sisters.



She was only occupied for 15 minutes before Play School became more interesting. That’s less than the fucking cloud dough.

1/5 would not recommend unless I’m not seeing that person ever again.

posted on the go; ignore mistakes


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